He is aware of EVERYTHING

HI friends and family!! 

I TRULY apologize for the length of this one in advance but I need to just get this out. Hopefully it's not just a throw up on you. (Well it is so I'm sorry)

It was a much needed amazing week. I don't know if I can explain it well enough for you to understand. I want everyone to know that I KNOW that God is there. And he knows ME. I'll just jump right in! 

So first of all. A bummer thing happened. But it turned into the best miracle and the most awakening moment of Gods love and awareness for me. Here's the story:

My companion and I had made a TREK to Target to buy groceries and some other necessities. (Target is in East Harlem so it was quite a ways away.) We needed to go to Target because it's cheaper than everywhere else and we needed certain things from there. let me also tell you that I was COMPLETELY out of money. My mission card balance was $0.00. And our dinner calendar was oddly empty. So we went to Target. Spent my personal funds and got some things that I needed. We put them in the kitchen at the church. Well... we came back to get them.. and they had been stolen! EVERYTHING except my new socks and toothpaste. You guys. My heart sunk and I literally felt so sad. Like who does that?? (New Yorkers do apparently.) We were sooo frustrated. Now I was really stressed. No food, and REALLY no money. I was just trying to keep my Christlike face on hahaha. But we couldn't hide the fact that we were so upset about it. My thoughts were "Why me!! What did I do wrong?" Thinking what did I do to deserve this? I was like did I do something wrong? Is this karma? Well shortly after that little mishap we cooled off and we went to a lesson with a less active. In that lesson we talked all about Christ. And how much he suffered for us. We talked about the pain he must have felt. And in that 45 minutes my heart was so warm and I felt peace. When I turned my thoughts to the Savior, who was Gods Only Begotten Son, Who was SO loved by his father, And who suffered and went through more than ANY other human would ever have to go through, I felt LOVE. And that just because I was going through a little challenge DOES NOT mean that God doesn't love me. If Jesus Christ suffered and went through all that he did.. who are we to say that God doesn't love us because of bad things that happen to us. So that was a special cool moment for me. But THE STORY gets better. 

So we headed back to the church and just as we walked in, the security guard, who is not a member pulled me aside and gave my companion and I forty dollars. I had a little tear in my eye and gave her a HUGE hug. I love her. She is always watching out for us. Well as NICE and as kind as that was, that money wouldn't get us far here in NYC. But we humbly and gratefully accepted he money. I felt God watching out for us. Okay well it gets better. So TODAY. We were at the grocery store buying new groceries. And I'm like a stress case thinking HOW am I going to pay for this. We grabbed some things that we needed and got in line while the WHOLE time I'm stressing about how I would paying for everything. So we get to the register and a very kind humble man followed us and paid for EVERYTHING. You guys. THAT NEVER EVER EVER EVER HAPPENS HERE IN NEW YORK. NEVER. My eyes swelled with tears and I was speechless. I kept saying thank you SO much thank you so much. Over and over again. I did not know what to do. I said to him you have absolutely NO idea of how much this means. I literally was choking back tears as I was thanking him. Well he then reached in his pocket and pulled out a hundred dollar bill. And SO HUMBLY AND KINDLY handed it over. Then I really couldn't hold back the tears. And there we stood in the grocery store with a very kind man who was an instrument in Heavenly Fathers hands. We walked out of the grocery store and I LITERALLY heard the words in my head "I am aware." And I just had little tiny tears streaming down my cheeks as we walked away. I can't explain the feeling. I cannot doubt God. I could NEVER deny that he knows me and he loves me and he is watching over me. I love him. I'm so grateful. I testify that Heavenly Father IS aware. This is HIS work and he is watching over us. 

Okay so now more goods.

(In Nephi's words...) my soul DELIGHTETH in birds chirping in the morning. And in BLOSSOMS. My soul delighteth in the spring time. There is a meteorologist in my ward and she said that Saturday was the first time it's hit 80 degrees since September 28th.  It had been about 203 days since the last 80 degree weather. I was wondering why it felt EXTRA special. Been outside in some chilly weather for quite sometime. And then it's been rainy the last few days. But April showers bring May flowers right? Weather. Sheesh. 

We met with some INCREDIBLE MEMBERS throughout the week. I have been so blessed to be surrounded by SUCH good people who have set very good examples for me. I have some good goals to work for. It's funny because after almost every dinner appointment I'm like "ugh I want to be you!" (And then 20 people later...) Haha.  I figured out I want to be just like the members here. Yay for New York members who set the bar so high for me. I will not settle. I'm gonna go work for what I want. 

My companion and I worked way way hard. We have been FINDING FINDING talking to EVERYONE. I think I talked to 1,000,000 people throughout the week. I love people. We have been reaching all of our goals and I KNOW that Heavenly Father is aware of our efforts. It was a great week. Putting your shoulder to the wheel and just doing the work really FEELS GOOD. I wish that I could write all the small miracle moments but I decided I want to write more about my studies and things that I learned rather than things that happened. 

Lately my brain has been consumed with thoughts about being HAPPY where we are no matter what. Not when "this or that" happens. But now! Thoughts like: "if I could just be married, I would be happy! If I could just have more money, I would be happy! When I'm done with school I will be happy! When I finish my mission I will be happy. If I could just lose 10 pounds I would be happy. When I'm done working here, I will be happy. When I do this or that or blah blah I will be happy." Those thoughts are doing us NO good. Just BE HAPPY NOW. We get to choose. Because we will ALWAYS have afflictions. Without afflictions we don't grow. (Without lifting painful weights, our muscles don't get stronger.) There won't be a time that we won't have any afflictions. So we must not wait for "that time" to be happy. 

I'm SO grateful for my Savior in times of afflictions. Because let's be honest, isn't it SO comforting when you know you're not all ALONE in something? Like example: I remember at home if I ate a piece of chocolate cake I was probably a little bummed about it afterwards. But if my sister came up to me and told me she ate a piece of chocolate cake too then I felt some peace about it. Haha or if I ate two cookies, then ky had to eat two cookies too!! (Maybe that's just me that feels the comfort in somebody else going through the same prob.) but I was just thinking about that, and how our Savior Jesus Christ is like that for all of us. Every hard thing we go through, HE has gone through. Every time we feel sad or discouraged or ANYTHING, he has felt the EXACT same way. I received this quote from a friend of mine and I loved it so much. It's by Tad R. Callister. He said: 

"As a result of his mortal experience, culminating in the Atonement, the Savior knows, understands, and feels every human condition, every human woe, and every human loss. He can comfort as no other. He can listen as no other, there is no hurt he cannot soothe, rejection he cannot assuage, loneliness he cannot console. Whatever affliction the world casts at us, He has a remedy of superior healing power."

I get chills when I read that. Jesus Christ is here to help all of us. Here's another GREAT quote that I found during my studies: 

"The Atonement has practical, personal, everyday value; apply it in your life. It can be activated with SO SIMPLE A BEGINNING AS PRAYER . You will not thereafter be free from trouble and mistakes but can erase the guilt through repentance and be at peace." LOVE IT. 

I HAVE to include this example from The Book of Mormon because I just read in Mosiah about Alma and his people being persecuted by Amulon and the Lamanites. So brief background: Amulon, was a part of the Lamanites and they are a bad group of people. They put guards around Alma and his people. (Alma=good guy.) And Amulon (who was a teacher/leader for the Lamanites) begins to persecute Alma and his good people who love the Lord. So Naturally, Alma and his people begin to cry mightily to God. Amulon commands them to stop. Amulon says that if anyone cries out to God they will be put to death. So Alma and his people don't cry out loud, but they pour out their HEARTS to Him. Now read what happens next!! 

Mosiah 24:13-15

13. And it came to pass that the voice of the Lord came to them in their afflictions, saying: Lift up your heads and be of good comfort, for I know of the covenant which ye have made unto me; and I will covenant with my people and deliver them out of bondage.

14. And I will also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions.

15. And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord."

So we can see that if we cheerfully rely on the Lord to face our challenges, He can take our limitations and our weaknesses and magnify them into strengths. I know that we can be happy through ALL of our afflictions. Alma and his people are SUCH good examples of submitting cheerfully and aligning our will with God's. I'm so grateful for my afflictions. I'm grateful that I have the choice to be happy. I'm grateful for how hard this mission is. Because of the challenges I have here, I am becoming stronger. And slowly and slowly becoming more like Christ. Who is PERFECT. I love perfect.

BEING HAPPY IS THE BEST. Love you alllll

Love Sister Abbs  Dunford